We don’t like to talk about it, but it hurts.
We don’t like to acknowledge it, because we think it will make it worse.
“Big boys don’t cry,” they told us. “Be strong,” they told us.
They said those things out of love, and they have wrecked us. They couldn’t have known that this would happen, so we can’t blame them. The emotional constipation those ideas set in place has created pain for us and those we hurt.
I am a man and I feel.
I feel scared, I feel worried, I feel hurt, I feel shame, I feel guilt, I feel fear. I feel so much that it hurts and I’m afraid that if I talk about it, it will make it worse.
I am a man and I feel happiness, I feel joy, I feel excitement. I feel so much that I think I might explode but I’ve been taught not to let it show too much.
My role in society has seemed so clear for so long and I’m now learning that what I thought was good, is bad. What I thought was right, was wrong. I’m left trying to be strong, to not let everyone down and at the same time, learn how to be vulnerable.
The expectations on me weigh heavy.
These are truths that many men carry with them in their lives. When you see us angry, please know that anger is the external face of internal pain.
We hold this in our bodies, and it takes its toll. What may look strong on the outside is often decaying on the inside. We wear armour on the outside that we’ve inherited and nurse wounds on the inside that we are in danger of passing on too.
One path through this mess is to reconnect with ourselves on a physical level. We don’t have to touch the scary mental/psychic stuff just yet. By taking care of our physical selves we can begin to let the armour soften and let some healing begin.
One dimension of Chiropractic care is that is brings us back into alignment physically and that helps to begin creating improvements in our internal alignment too. It is often an opening to so much more than the pain relief many use it for at first.
This path is not a quick fix but the Outside-In attempts of the past have born little fruit and much harm, maybe it’s time for on Inside-Out approach. After all, that’s how life works.
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